Are you Ahab?

I am taught that it’s a man that finds the wife. But why does it seem that the man doesn’t wanna step up but rather is choosing to be like Ahab. A punk!!!

It hurts to hear a man say you are not wife material but I also believe that the man that is saying it is not husband material if he is uncovering your sin for the whole world to see.

Because you my dear are not a man of valor, but you have that lucifer spirit. That wants to degrade and attack women, rather than having the Jesus spirit which will build and cherish his bride.

So that being said
I am determined to believe what God is saying about me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, while possessing the attributes of a Proverbs 31 woman.

Who is in the process of being made into that which God has said from the beginning.

Now! Where is that praying man? Who is up for the challenge?


Peace Police



You know exactly when things may begin to falter and with your intuitive abilities you often asses the situation prior to any conflict. This has others warming to your non- threatening and very personable persona. Your silent and distinct mannerisms see you as the master quiet achiever.

As the integrator of the study, you represent union and bringing together of all others. The mere fact that the number which symbolizes your type carries super spiritual ramifications allows for you at your best to have a totality of understanding into your own contribution to the balance of society in general. All sounds very mystical and even overboard, however, these attributes really do flourish within you when you at your best.

You are capable of foreseeing the end result for the benefit of all through your instinctual decision making process and your intuitive reaction to the environment. When in balance you sit center to the relating triad gaining the positive aspects of both personalities either side within your wings.

When you are at your best you are often seen as the ultimate listener looking at all aspects of a situation and on consideration making correct decisions for all concerned. Your natural demeanor to bring about peace and harmony allows for others to gravitate to you and share their inner most thoughts with full confidence.

As with all personalities we need to have a total understanding of both our strengths and our weaknesses in order for us to grow and move forward in life. For this reason I have put together a couple of areas that you may need to address in order to assist in expanding your innate strengths.

With your drive to maintain union and peace by the avoidance of conflict, it may be seen that your avoidance can actually create the very thing you avoid; conflict. You need to be aware that your fears are not bigger than you and you really need to express your opinions with assertiveness. Once you manage this, your innate leadership and guiding skills kick in to create a very harmonious situation. You begin to believe in yourself and your innate qualities that create a safe environment for others comes to the fore.

You must appreciate the value of your own opinion and learn the art of expression without fear of condemnation. Realise that by blending in with others or the environment will sabotage your sense of self and build resentment. Act on your intuition and avoid procrastination in order for you to reconnect to your silent inner authority.

You really do love this program. It’s non-threatening and allows you to silently get a grasp on everyone in your world. Not being one to jump about making loud noises about things, means that with this program you can gain wisdom through patient understanding of how it works. The accuracy assures you of its legitimacy and this brings to you a sense of peace and tranquility.

You love the fact that some of those more boisterous people in your life can be described to the nth degree creating a total knowingness for you and better yet relief that it’s quite normal for them.

The program takes away the fear of conflict in others for you and this inspires you to branch out with your suppressed authority allowing for your esteem to gather immensely. You thrive on the fact that the program can literally kick start you ability to express to others and have them coming to you for your advice on sensitive matters. It is in your nature to nurture through understanding and empathy and not necessarily sympathy or apathy.

Your personality can almost come to life with this program because it allows you to find your voice so to speak. Others who over talk you will begin to see the assertiveness you posses through you owning your own space.


My frustration comes from a place:

My Children. Right-now belong in a better place, and that place is with their father. He is more stable than I am, that’s what I call sacrificial love. There were days when I didn’t have it to give to them, I miss waking up to there foolery in the mornings. My God is sufficient and I believe He will continue to take care of me and them.

People don’t understand my reasoning, but that’s ok I do. I hate depending on people, I hate them throwing things back in my face like whatsoever you have God isn’t the one who gave it to you.

One day all shall see my reasoning, I remember feeling as if my heart was cut into a million pieces. When you love 4 vessels that came out of your womb without anesthesia and people wanna tell you what love or lack thereof you have for them.

There was times my heart bleed, no car, no phone, no money, no place and no cooperation from family. Just cold shoulders and whispers behind close doors. My family did it so why should I expect any different from you, why would I have hope because you name the name of Christ.

When in actuality judgements are here, verdicts are drawn and gavels are slammed stating case closed. Because my need is more prevalent than yours, sacrifice your family once again, whisper and lie once again while you ask for me to uplift and edify you, pray for yours.

When consistently you and your seeds are the ones dividing and conquering mine. But not knowing that all is not as it appears and unless you have walked a day in my shoes, who are you to cast stones.

I have been told to sacrifice when I have sacrificed much this is not the first family but the 4th where I had to continue in this plight.

When will it end?
When I refuse to jump to there rope and dance to the beat of their drum. Invoking a consistent heavenly call.
Truth be told it’s not easy to walk with a Holy God who requires holiness and truth, Selah

Don’t ever pass judgement on those that sacrifice in the name of what’s best.

Example the other day i had provision to see them but in actuality I didn’t wanna do it again 31 days of bliss and then nothing MIA for the next 31 days.

The day will come when I will be able to be consistent and all that pass judgement will eat their words.

For in life there are mountains, valleys and deserts.

Father give me strength to learn and be still and know that you are God.


What’s Your Life Brand?

In life we shed many tears and have many fears, because we believe the lies that the enemy tells us. Verses trusting in the good that God has presented to us in the form of provision.

He provided us with the ability to take 44 breaths per minute. I don’t know about you but in my eyes that’s pretty awesome, considering there is approximately 300,000 people that die per day.

I know that God is good based on so much more, in my favorite psalm He said oh! that men would praise Him for His goodness to the children of men. But no what do we think about;


And the unfounded charges that the accuser of the brethren brings up and presents as evidence, don’t be mistaken He uses the inner circle the ones we call family and friends, you see they have the sin of familiarity.
Like Jesus his family didn’t realize he was divinity, they didn’t know He was not only a Carpenter, but also the Messiah. Who are you? And does your friends and family recognize who you are? They look at your flesh, which they are not to judge any man after the flesh. Presenting your weakness when we are to lean on Christ’s strength.

They also present issues that God, the Word of life has already dealt with.its under the blood, washed until nothing but purity is seen. I believe therefore I shall speak, what God has for you is for you yes!

But how dare you think that what God has for me is yours. I know in marriage what I have is His and what God has since I am married to Him is mine. So to think you can steal or plot against me is a trip, lol i am one spirit with Him. So if the truth be told my inheritance, my treasure which is hidden in Him. Is not to be assumed to be yours lol

Persons that are smarter, allow there mouths to betray them. If you don’t respect me and what I say or think there is no way we can be partners in anything.

Not now, then, or ever!

The kingdom suffers violence but the violent ones take it by force. Evidence is in the walk, it’s in the life.

What is your life brand?
Child Of God


Open questions

Sometimes I wonder whether or not God cares.
Does He see my situation?
Does He hear my prayers?
Does He hear my heart cry?

Oh! I know my problems don’t matter and they are not of any importance. Because if they are important then I have a lack if faith or I am weak.
Any who I know the Word and my heart is not in the arena of faithlessness. I just have many questions, but it’s without answer, because if I bring it up. I am either complaining or oh! You don’t have faith.

So while The Lord is Silent because I am going through a test. Hope is not in doubt so I rebuke the spirit in Jesus, and keep my mouth shut. Only to open to speak words of life.

Maybe it’s good that I have no one to talk to because then my opinions don’t get thrown in my face. Job asked many questions during His test and I hear people say that he wined and complained too much. Was it the question or the rehearsal of what He was going through. That made people even now judge Him. They didn’t judge Jesus because he kept His mouth shut. Oh! When you do that your are called stuck up! And indifferent or you are judging. Which is so hypocritical since they judging you for being silent.

When praises go up blessings come down, when mis-judgements go forth what happens?

Anyway I am done letting loose



Throw out the Gavel…

Dear Jury,

The thing is this, if we are to be lead by the spirit of God. Why are their so much human fragility in each other’s request. Being boxed in, being limited, no longer a free act of ones will but more a list, a chore to be done.

Will there ever be a time when freedom true freedom to spend time with the Father a time with out there being an agenda. Names, places and things are constantly on my mind, lists don’t forget this, don’t forget that.

Whew! You did it. Did you mis anyone, did you for get to include such and such. No longer a act of ones will, no longer a carefree enjoyable act of worship. But a Chore!

Who enjoys chores forced on us by those that are in or want to be in authority. Believers don’t believe they pray, believers don’t read for that doesn’t help them, only! Pray.

When will it be because you dropped a name, time and place in my spirit. No to be seen as something owed, a debt unpaid, or a bill due with past due notices.

There is a term in the Word which says self ambition? Hmm is that what that means? Me being selfish or vicer versa. Well when it’s all said and done my moves are to be led, by who?

Secondly, whether your saved or unsaved sexual conversations are not. Sinful only when done in a vulgar manner, I would never judge for an opinion because it’s just that an opinion. My experience doesn’t make me any more or less Holy. And a persons stance on the subject doesn’t make me less Saved, anointed or called by Him and in Him to speak what I know. When asked… Truth be told many are falling short whether for seconds, minutes, days or years but who am I to tell you whether or not you will see this side of Heaven.

Many know the Word inside and out but do you do it! That’s where the truth lies in being a doer not a judge with a bolder in my eye. Lately I feel less qualified to speak on any topic, because it seems that opinions mount up to mount Rush Moore, ready to fall on my face, like dung!


There are several vices in the Word and alcohol is one of them, but it doesn’t say not to drink alcohol, but it does say leaders shouldn’t partake in such activities. As well as it’s for those that have weak stomachs who are weak or dying. So after reading those let the word do the judging.

My thoughts, feelings and opinions don’t make you or anyone else less qualified to stand before God and His throne of mercy. My intellect, my human fragility, my flesh doesn’t supersede the doctrine of Christ.

One thing I know we all have a call but not all will do it. Whether that means releasing a word in or out of season, but Lord give me the grace to handle my obedience on you because just as Jesus was persecuted for the truth, whether or not he felt joy about the matter. He spoke it only to please you and set those that would believe free!


Ps 1
Sorry for my ramblings on about the Word of truth, but I mainly write out if my experiences.

Ps 2
Never fault find
Never judge
For my obedience or heart is not clean enough to clean anyone else’s.

When I grow up…

A Belief in a higher power is what gets some through, knowing that He has a plan for us from the beginning. But this post is not about me so sit tight and let’s look at some one else…

You see the beautiful baby above isn’t she cute, adorable, fearfully and wonderfully made by our creator, but will she ever know? Will she always aspire to physical self improvement, buying the stereotypical shifts, myths and beliefs. Dreaming for a look, a way of being and doing that may never be a attainable.

Will she press fearlessly into that realm of perfection?

By Lightening her skin or by getting breast implants? Justifiably so she says stopping at butt shot alley, lypo-suction median while defending never ending sagas of breast morphs is.

Does she say I will never be enough, never light enough, never big or small enough?
Does she say I refuse to stay this way or that way?
Do we say it doesn’t really matter? As women we all have our hang ups. No matter the race, ethnic group or variety we all still bleed to the finish line of I wanna be perfect!!!

Jane "I wanna be you" big lips, but thick in the hips.

Josephine "I wanna be you" straight hair with a pointy nose.

How can God win?

He screams from His throne of beauty. My daughters are made to perfection, each one created for my glory because you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Your hair is your glory.
Your nose hand picked. lol
Your eyes set as original design.

Everything about you screams divinity. You are not to be compared, not even the finger print on your hands can be duplicated.

I have your names printed on the palm of my hands but then you decided that what I have made is low grade, when I declared all the way from hades to the heavens above that you are good.

My daughters take delight in how I have made you, take note of the ingenious design. Your not in a competition no! Not in anyway.

In an art gallery people walk around and they take notice of pieces of art while approving or disapproving of each item. Some highly honored and sold to the highest bidder. None are ever cast aside or down graded.
But you get up every day with out taking notice of the handy work I have made in the form of YOU!

You are a treasure that can never be duplicated, serious art work, a center piece, extravagantly put together formed with an extreme purpose.

Trust in your value, you have been stamped Grade A.

It’s impossible for God to make a mistakes.